"I'm Unavailable" is a Sufficient Reason
By Tana M. Mann Easton, Lead Efficiency Engineer
When people are communicating to find a mutually agreeable time to get together, I’ve noticed an interesting pattern in myself and others throughout the years. If one person suggests some date/time options and one of those options works for the other party, there’s no issue. The meeting is easily scheduled.
However, if one person suggests dates/times to get together, and none of those options work for the other person, the responder often won’t just say they’re unavailable for those dates and suggest some new ones. The responder will likely feel strongly compelled to also tell a reason (real or made up) about WHY they’re unavailable.
Whenever I am trying to schedule time with someone else, if I suggest options that don’t work for the other person, I never need to know why. The options are a binary yes/no, pass/fail, true/false answer. Either yes, you are available. Or no, you are not available. If you have work, travel, personal, family, leisure, etc plans that interfere with my suggested times, then you are unavailable. To me, it makes no difference if you have the most important work meeting of your life or you simply need a mental health day. You already have plans for the requested dates, and we keep moving on to find others.
But so often, people (me included) turn this simple yes/no answer into an essay question. We feel like we need to justify why we can’t meet during those suggested times. I’ll be out of town that day. I have another client meeting at that time. It’s not a big issue that we feel the need to explain and justify ourselves, except when we feel like our reasons for being unavailable won’t be good enough to the other person. I see this most often when people have personal time commitments that are already scheduled and someone in their professional sphere asks for that time. For example, someone from work asks to meet with you at a specific time when you need to take your child to the doctor and you feel like taking your child to the doctor isn’t a good enough reason to refuse anyone at work ever. Or someone from work wants to meet at a time when you scheduled a much-needed massage. Obviously if the work people are notoriously hard to get and it would be easy enough to reschedule the doctor or massage appointments, then rescheduling is always an option. But if we are just concerned that the other person won’t think our reason is good enough, we can always remember that they don’t need a reason. “I’m unavailable,” is a sufficient reason with no explanations.
Some people even invent lies to justify their unavailability. They’re going to a baseball game with their excited kids but they say they’ll be out of town at a conference. They have a dental exam but they say they’ll be at a networking event. Lies aren’t necessary. Just say you’re unavailable.
I, and I would guess the vast majority of other people, trust that as an adult, you are the best judge of your time. We don’t need an essay answer or justification if you can’t meet during the times we suggest. A simple “I’m unavailable” is good enough along with some alternate options. Don’t discount your personal life when scheduling your professional time. Jobs come and go, but you only have one family and one life.
If you or your team would like to sign up for our 2 hour Balance and Productivity training to instantly double your meaningful output and find the feeling of lasting flow and optimized work life balance, please click here and say hello!
Sincerely Yours,
Focus to Evolve Team